LIFE ISN'T ABOUT FINDING YOURSELF. LIFE IS ABOUT CREATING YOURSELF.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Failed Attempts

Our life's journey is made up of the many experiences that we have along the way.  We obviously enjoy the positive and happy experiences the most but a lot of times the failed attempts we encounter are the ones that shape us into who we are. 

Without challenge, there is no progress. 

I am thankful for the many failed attempts that I have had through my life.  In that moment of failure you cannot truly see the lesson hidden within.  I guess that is the beauty in getting older, you are able to reflect upon those situations and find that so called "silver lining".  Failed attempts at things force us to grow and change.  Ultimately, it is up to us to decide in which way we grow and change.  I for one, have always chosen to build upon those failed attempts to create a smarter, wiser and better me.

Here are some of the failed attempts I've encountered.  Some are serious and others, not so much.  I have allowed these experiences to mold me into who I am today and I am grateful for them!

- I was obsessed with trying to fly as a child.  I don't know what it was about it and why I wanted to so badly but my imagination would run wild with ideas of how I could fly.  I got this grand idea that if I jumped off of one of the calf barns while holding onto a garbage bag that I would be able to fly for a bit.  Dumb idea, right?  Nope, not to my nine year old mind!  Needless to say, it hurt a lot when I slammed into the ground.  Sad part of my story: I tried more than once.  Persistence must have been breed into me!  Lesson I learned: I can't fly.

- Learning how to ride a bike was a pretty big deal and I thought I was awesome once I learned.  I must have been about seven years old when I got the challenge from my big brother to play chicken.  I wasn't an expert bike rider and I've never been one to back down from a dare so I agreed.  There we were, riding directly towards each other and neither of us willing to give in.  Well, I ended up flying through my big handlebars and crashing onto the gravel driveway and rolling into the ditch.  The scraps stung badly and lesson learned: don't challenge my big brother or agree to stupid dares!

- Growing up on a farm meant learning how to drive a tractor.  Pretty sweet huh?  Not if you almost knock a grain bin over onto yourself or almost roll the tractor over in the ditch.  This was a serious lesson learned from a failed attempt at driving a tractor.  I wasn't paying full attention to what I was doing and damn near killed myself twice.  Dad didn't let me drive another tractor for a long, long time and I was OK with that. 

- My brother Jason is 2 years older than me and was often my partner in crime while growing up.  We would dare each other to ride the calves while doing chores.  I would repeatedly get the wind knocked out of me from getting bucked off.  I'm lucky I never broke a bone or sprained an ankle.  Lesson I took from it: don't do stupid things that could result in physical harm.

- Girls, do you remember the very first time you ever shaved your legs?  Oh my gosh.  This was an experience that I will never forget.  I was terrified of doing it but already had friends that were shaving so I knew it was time.  By the end, I had like 30 pieces of toilet paper stuck on cut spots and thought to myself that I didn't care if I ever did it again.  What did I learn, nothing really.  I still cut my damn legs, ugh!

- Prom is a huge deal and Senior prom is a pivotal moment in high school.  I wasn't the most popular girl and didn't have a boyfriend so I was fearful of going to prom dateless.  I had hoped that someone would just ask me but as prom got closer, I realized that just wasn't going to happen.  I had a major crush on one of my friends and fellow classmate.  I worked up the courage to call him and ask him to prom.  He had a date already.  Failure and letdown was felt hard that night but the lesson I took from it was to not be afraid of rejection or failure.  You never know what you are capable of unless you try!

- This is a good one.  I made the varsity cross country team as a little 7th grader.  I was at my first race and didn't know what to expect.  I was nervous, excited, anxious and had no clue of the time frame of a meet schedule.  I was waiting in line to use the bathroom when last call to check in was announced.  I had an "oh crap" moment.  What do I do?  I left the bathroom line and got on the start line instead.  There was no way I was going to miss my first ever varsity race.  That decision resulted in me peeing my pants during the race.  Gross, I know.  Hard to relive it but I gained a big lesson from that experience.  I never go into anything with out knowing an overview of the schedule and I always make sure I go pee first!

- Seven is my number... for car accidents I've been in.  Some were my fault, others were not and there was one freak incident too.  Most important lesson I took from these: there is NOTHING that is worth getting hurt in a car accident for.  I am OK with being 2 or 3 minutes behind because I still have my life.

- 2004 Senior track season was a heart breaker.  I missed going to state in the long jump by less than a 1/4 of an inch.  I was new to the 300 hurdles but had a shot at making it to state in that too.  I was leading all the way to 100 meters left when I got to a hurdle that someone had set to the wrong height.  My trail leg caught and I fell.  It was evaluated and the committee granted me another chance to run it, by myself, after I finished anchoring the 4x400 and had a PR for my split.  I ran the 300 hurdles again but I didn't improve due to exhaustion.  Lesson learned: NEVER EVER GIVE UP! 

- Lastly, I could not do this post without sharing my first drinking experience.  I was 17 years old when I drank for the first time.  I thought I was a rock start that Saturday night.  What I didn't realize; church was at 8 AM the next morning.  I'm catholic so we do a lot of stand, sit, kneel, stand, sit, repeat.  This continual motion was no good for me and my first ever hangover.  We were halfway through service when God's mighty hand struck me.  I knew I was going to puke.  I excused myself and once I hit the back of the church I think I ran the fastest 400 meters ever and then proceeded to throw up all over the church's bathroom.  I certainly felt like I was going to hell after doing that.  It was not a proud or shinning moment in my life.  Lesson learned: hangovers and church to not mix.

I know I'm not perfect and I never have been.  I have had to learn things the hard way but I can tell you that I am all the more wiser for having gone through them!

peace & love
bj


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